Oakie Doesn’t Do Much

Mom is getting ready to go on vacation again. This time to the other side of the world. It perplexes me why she keeps leaving me at home. Why would she want to leave this ball of cuteness at home? I can tell when she’s leaving. She takes her time in packing, and when she’s about to leave through the door, I like to run towards it and block her way. Then she picks me up and gives me hugs and kisses. And then she’s gone for two weeks. I weep, don’t leave me mommy!

xx,
Oakie

You’re going to start seeing a repeat of photos in these next few posts because mom is too lazy to take new pix of me. Why wouldn’t anyone want to take a photo of me? This is a mystery.

xx,
Oakie

Still no sign of the scissors. I guess that’s cool. Mom found a pair of dull scissors and tried to snip my butt hairs. I was not happy about that. First of all, she does not need to be snoopin’ around in that area. Hey lady, I don’t poke your butt with sharp objects! Hands off my pooter!

xx,
Oakie

Mom still can’t find her scissors. I kind of need a haircut, badly. I’m starting to look really emo with these bangs in my eye. Don’t I look sad?

xx,
Oakie

Sundays are weird for me. My eating schedule is totally wack. Sometimes mom will go out and come back late on a Sunday and forget to feed me. I’ll cry and ask her for food, but she doesn’t always understand me. Then she’ll take me out to poop and finally realize I should have eaten 2 hours ago. Then she’ll say sorry and feel really bad. That’s when I like to head butt her and tell her she failed as a mom! But then I say just kidding because I want her to feed me.

xx,
Oakie

Mom let me jump on the bed this morning. It was so awesome. She said it was because I had clean fur from my recent bath, so she let me snuggle with her this morning in bed before we got up to start our day. We played big spoon little spoon. I was the little spoon because the little one is always the cuter one. Then we slept for an hour. Then we got up. Then I had to pee really badly.

xx,
Oakie

I bet mom wonders what I do all day while she’s at work. Here’s a detailed breakdown of my daily schedule:

Sleep
Sleep
Sleep
Bark at squirrel
Chase my tail
Sleep

That pretty much sums it up. I get so much done when she’s gone. Now if only I knew how to open the doors, then I could poop on my own, too!

xx,
Oakie

I really need a haircut. I can barely see behind my bangs. I look like Emo Oakie. But even though I know I need a haircut, I hate getting them. That’s why I hid mom’s scissors. She’s been looking for then since Sunday. HAHAHA!! She has no idea where they are! I totally hid them, but I’m not going to tell you in case she reads this blog. Oh man she’s gonna feel so stupid when she figures out where they are. So for now I guess I’ll just walk around with my impaired vision. It’s all good. I’m not embarrassed when mom throws the ball to me and I have no idea where it is even though it’s right under my nose!

xx,
Oakie

It rained last night. Not just any light rain. It rained hard. And it thundered. Really loudly. And there were huge flashes of lightning. I couldn’t sleep a wink! I kept mom up with my crying and whining all night. I’m sorry.. I’m scared of these things! Burglar? Monster? Giant squirrel? I got that covered. But the sound of thunder? I run for cover!!!

xx,
Oakie

I looked so cute in my costume last night that I am posting another one of me in it. Here I am looking very dejected. I’ve lost the costume battle with mom. She won. I wore the danged outfit. Looks more like pajamas than a mummy costume if you ask me. But at least it’s designer-worthy. Martha Stewart brand. Yep, I’m stylin’. I’m mummy-licious.

xx,
Oakie