Oakie Sleeps

Mom has been keeping me up at night. Last night she stayed up and watched TV and was talking loud on the phone. Gawd! Ma!! I hate it when she’s up late at night and it disturbs my squirrel dreams. I was having a good one too! I was all moving and twitching my legs as I slept, and I was barking under my breath in my dream. Not that I knew I was doing it. Mom told me I was. But she also woke me up with her annoying voice. I was just about to catch the squirrel in my dream!

xx,
Oakie

If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. Instead of fighting off those jeans mom puts on my head when I sleep, I just sleep with it like a blanket. It’s not very toasty, and they kind of smell funny. I bet she farted in them. She’s good at that. Sometimes I’ll think her fart is someone at the door and I’ll bark to keep whatever evil is outside away from us, but then I realize it was just stinky evil air coming out of mom’s butt.

xx,
Oakie

My mom. She’s so silly. Here she is bothering me in my sleep again. But instead of poking me with her toes or petting my head, she put her jeans over my face. Nice, mom. Real mature. Are you trying to suffocate me?! Go away! I’m sleeping!!!!

xx,
Oakie

Mom is always bothering me when I’m sleeping. She thinks it’s funny to poke me with her wiggly toes or scratch my head when I’m dozing off. Sure I love it when she does that when I’m fully awake, but leave me alone when I’m sleeping! I’m dreaming of squirrels! And Snausages!

xx,
Oakie

Writing blogs is hard stuff! My life isn’t that interesting, so I need to come up with stuff to share with .. uh.. with.. myself.. seeing as no one reads my blogs. But I like to keep the absent informed anyway. So uh, today I had breakfast, then I watched mom go to work, then I slept, then mom came home from work late, then she took me out to poo and pee and I ate dinner. Then I watched her play on the computer and that’s about it. Yay. So exciting.

xx,
Oakie

My favorite kinds of days are days where I do nothing and just lounge around on the floor. I like to lay on my side and rest my fat belly against the carpet. Mom puts down towels all over the floor because I’m a dirty little stinker and I’ll turn the carpet brown. Not my fault she doesn’t bathe me often enough. Okay, maybe it is my fault because I cower when it’s bath time. I hate un-contained water!

xx,
Oakie

Good morning! I like Mondays. I like it when mom goes to the bathroom in the mornings before work because that’s when she usually gives me a treat. The bag of Snausages sits next to the sink, and she will usually reach over and give me a piece as she is taking a leak on the toilet. Hehe. She puts the treat on my nose and I wait for the okay before I toss my head dramatically so the treat falls to the floor and I find it and gobble it up! Then she gives me a pat on the head, and then I run out of the bathroom, wipe my face on the carpet, and lay down for a 10 minute nap until mom is ready to take me out for my morning poop! What a great routine!

xx,
Oakie

July, July, July, it never seemed so strange. I got that from The Decemberists. I’m a hip dog. I listen to bands you’ve never heard of.

I’m starting to run out of stuff to blog about. Everyday is about the same. I sleep, eat, poop, repeat. Tomorrow is mommy’s day off. Maybe we’ll do something special and I’ll write about it. But probably not. She’ll probably go shopping without me and leave me home. Weep!!

xx,
Oakie

Hi friends! I am so behind on my blogs! Today is actually July 12, but I am writing for June 30 because I have been lazy and not posting for you zero readers out there! At least I’m not under any pressure to deliver any bloggy goodness because I have 0 traffic everyday. Hehe. Why even write this blog? So I can keep a diary! But I haven’t written in 2 weeks now, so that kind of defeats the purpose. I’ll be better about it though! Ta ta for now. Or actually, I’m about to write the next blog entries up until July 12! EEK!

xx,
Oakie

Mondays! Yuck! I hate ’em as much as mama does. After sleeping in over the weekend, I kind of want to sleep in on Monday, too! But I gotta get up when mom gets up. Luckily, as she gets ready for work, I can sneak in a quick nap before she takes me out to potty. After that, mom leaves for work and I go back to sleeping. It’s a stressful life, but somebody’s gotta do it! And that somebody is me!!

xx,
Oakie